We’re so over Kat Von D and Jesse James. The two just make it totally impossible to be happy for them. Even if you can get past the Sandra Bullock factor, you can’t get past their desperately suffocating tweets. But before we get to that, let’s chat about the first reason we feel full of vom when we look at these two: Kat wore an enormous ring on her finger at the Art of Elysium charity gala in Los Angeles on Saturday night, naturally sparking engagement rumors. Which we assume was the whole point.

Of course she and James have been very careful not to reveal anything via their Twitters. Well, anything about their engagements. They’ve revealed a whole host of other queasiness-inducing BS. Jesse tweeted to Kat, “48 hours away from you feels like a year…you will never be anything but beautiful to me.” To which she responded, “It feels like eternity to me. What are we gonna do? I’m not a stage-five-clinger, but I need you around me, babe.”

What are you gonna do? You’re not poor 18-year-olds separated by an ocean and money. You get in the car or on a plane or whatever and just go the person. But wait, that would’t be nearly as sensible as taking to your keyboard and pounding out your angsty desperation. We assume there was some Shakespear’s Sister playing in the background along with one solitary black candle burning.

Get over yourselves.

Kat is also shown on December 6th in Berlin.